“I can’t”… “It’s not possible”… “I’m not good enough”… ~ These are lies the demons of your past use to scare away the possibilities of the present.”― Steve Maraboli
“I just don’t think I can be successful at this. As I sat listening to this beautiful woman, I pondered the many times I had heard a version of this comment. She was bright, articulate and talented. She had recently enrolled in a sales business with great enthusiasm but was now ready to throw in the towel. “I just don’t have the time”, she said. She quickly added, “I don’t have the experience or the contacts that Susie has”.
How about you? Have you ever crafted a story like this? It begins with the reason why you can’t be successful at something. A comparison statement about why your situation is different from another experiencing success follows. On the surface, the story sounds reasonable. But the truth is statements such as these are fear- based lies that keep us from achieving our goals and dreams. Eliminating these will open the door to increased creativity and opportunity.
Here are 7 strategies for eliminating the “I’m not Good Enough” lie:
1. Avoid comparisons. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. The key is to move forward with what you do well. Delegate or team up with another who has strength in the area of your perceived weakness. For example, a person who enjoys meeting people but is not so good with follow-up can partner with another who excels at the behind the scenes work.
2. Learn to encourage yourself. Whatever we focus on expands. Take time every night to write down at least one success you experienced that day. No matter how small it appears write it down. Celebrate even the small victories such as “I picked up the phone and made a sales call”.
3. Focus on progress not perfection. There is no such thing as “perfect”. Keep in mind a big win consists of a lot of small wins. We don’t achieve the perfect weight overnight. We do put in place an exercise program one day at a time.
4. Ask better questions. Asking questions like, “Why can’t I…” lead to undesirable results. These type of questions only drive your brain to search the archives of your past to find an answer. Instead, ask a question such as, “How could I…” or “What would I need to do to…” These questions open the door for creativity.
5. Use sentence starters. These are powerful ways to brainstorm and lead you to focus in a positive direction. An example is, “I can grow my business if I….” Then fill in as many possible answers as you can. E.g. I can grow my business if I (arrange meetings with potential clients, network, do free speaking, advertise….)
6. Practice acceptance by staying in the now. Using energy to complain about what is, how it “should” be, or how you wish it was only leads to frustration. When we hold the idea that all is working for good we are better able to see the opportunity or lesson. With acceptance comes a sense of peace and openness. This is the state that attracts ideas, people and resources.
7. Recall your “why” and take action. Nothing will convince you are your potential like success. Nothing will create success like action. And nothing will motivate you to take action like remembering your “why”. This is where the rubber meets the road. No matter how you “feel”, just do it!
“Remember, a real decision is measured by the fact that you’ve taken new action. If there’s no action, you haven’t truly decided.” ~ Anthony Robbins