Have you ever met a person for the first time and felt instant trust and connection? What is it that makes us instantly feel comfortable with some people and not with others? The answer is rapport. The dictionary defines rapport as having harmonious relation, connection or trust.
Have you ever studied the body language of lovers and notice how they seem to be perfectly in-sync with each other? This matching has been called “mirroring” in NLP. The principle is that In general, people like and trust people who are like them. Thus practicing mirroring is a powerful tool for building trust and connection.
Mirroring includes matching observable qualities such as
- Facial expressions
- Posture and body language
- Sensory preference language
- Energy levels
- Breathing
Recent research published in the Harvard Business Review showed there’s actually a neural basis for that feeling of connection. The mirroring process is not just happening externally but In good communication, the listener’s brain activity begins to mirror the speaker’s brain activity. This research is one of the first to move our understanding of communication from being 2 processes that occur in a single brain to a single act happening between two brains.
Creating rapport is both an art and a science and it can be learned. Begin by being fully present with the person you are communicating with. Observe their expression, the angle of the tilt of their head, their posture. Listen to the key phrases they use when speaking. These phrases will help you discover their sensory learning preference. Are they auditory? Notice phrases such as, “I hear you”. Are they visual? You will hear them use phrases like, “I see what you mean”. Or are they kinesthetic? Kinesthetic phrases often include the word “feel” for example, “I just don’t feel right about that”.
Have fun beginning to mirror their vocal and physical mannerisms as well as using their sensory preference vocabulary without being so obvious you appear to be mimicking them. The result is sure to mean new friendships and as well as increased sales, retention and business success.
Posted by Prosperity Coach Brenda Byers-Im, creator or the Triple Crown Prosperity Plan to help you discover how to prosper in ALL areas of life! Join Brenda’s “The Art & Science of Creating Rapport” workshop in a city near you. https://brendabyers.com/Events
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